Day 1: The Person I've Been Closest to the Longest

This is my best friend and non biological sister, Shelby.  We have known each other since we were in the fourth grade. She knows everything about me and I can tell her anything.  She has been there for me as much as she can a could be, and I know she always will be.  I am so thankful that God put her in my life because without here I have no idea what I would do. Love ya Shelbs.  

16 Years of Life

A year old!

2 years old!

3 years old!

7 years old!

10 years old!

13 years old!

13 years old, 8th grade graduation!

14 years old, cheerleader freshman year!!

15 years old, prom night!

16 years old fall homecoming of junior year!!!




God has given me 16 years of life.  Not all 16 years were wonderful and fun, but the majority of them were.  These twelve pictures are of me as you can see, so you can follow me through my 16 years of life.  I am thankful for what God has given me, and I will be thankful for everyday that he has left for me.  Weather I'm 18 years old when I die or 89, I will be grateful for every single one of those days, so right now i am going to start a 30 day photo challenge and here is everything I am going to put on here!!!




Day 01 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest

with the longest


Day 02 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts

Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show


Day 04 - A picture of your favorite band or artist


Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory


Day 06 - A picture of something you'd love to trade places with 


for a day


Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item


Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh


Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the 


most


Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most weird things 


with


Day 11 - A picture of something you hate


Day 12 - A picture of something you love


Day 13 - A picture of a memorable night


Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life 


without


Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die


Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you


Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on 


your life recently


Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity


Day 19 - A picture and a letter


Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel


Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget


Day 22 - A picture of something you wish you were better at


Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book


Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change


Day 25 - A picture of your day


Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you


Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member


Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of


Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile


Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss

What Would I be Without You?

For the past year and a half my boyfriend (guy in the pictures with me if you haven't noticed yet) has constantly picked me up when I fell, he has been there when I needed him, and not once has he walked out on me, but I am going to tell you a story about what I did to him.

I was the one who walked out on him once, I was scared to let him in my heart, and i was scared to love him. I was scared to love him because everyone else in my "birth family"
walked out on me, and I figured "well one day he is going to know who I really am, both good and bad sides of me and he is going to walk out on me like everyone else, so I'm just going to save myself the heartache and leave him." I just left him, not only did I break my own heart in leaving him because I loved him, but I broke his too.  I hate hurting people and when I finally realized that I broke his heart it hurt me.I thought I was doing him good in leaving him so i would save him the trouble of leaving me... truth was and still is, he loved/loves me and he is never going to leave me, but on top of breaking up with him, I also lied to him about why I broke up with him. I told him  that I broke up with him because he was "yelling at me over stupid stuff," when he really wasn't, after we broke up, he was still there for me, but, we were constantly fighting every time we talked, so we just cut off all communication between us. Three months later, I began to miss him, I began missing what we had and I knew he missed it too, I only know this because, the few times we did talk he told me he missed us, he missed what we had, and finally I was beginning to feel the same way. Before we got back together I wrote him a letter telling him the truth of why I broke up with him, he was a little peeved at why I just hadn't been honest in the first place, but, I knew if I had told him he wouldn't leave me alone, and at that point in time I wanted to be left alone by him. I wanted nothing to do with him. The night we got back together, I discovered something that I never realized before, I discovered that I honestly did love him,  I knew I loved him when I broke up with him the first time, but I had doubts, but the night we got back together was when it hit me, square in the face. Ever since we got back together I fall in love with him more and more everyday, even though we don't talk everyday I still fall in love with him more and more each and everyday, because, I know he will be there for me forever, he will never leave my side, even when he dies he will never leave my side, because I will still have him in my heart, and as long as I have him in my heart he will be by my side, just like I will be by his, dead or alive.  Each and everyday I thank God (literally) that he has given me another day to 1. Spend more time with Neal, 2. Spend more time with my family, and 3. To have another day to work hard at what I want to someday be my dreams, but those are besides the point.  Without Neal I honestly do not know where I would be today.  I try to think of my life without Neal in it and just thinking about it makes my stomach turn, it would kill me if he really weren't in my life today.  I would be absolutely nothing without Neal, so Neal if you are reading this, which i know you will be eventually, I want you to know that I love you and I will never stop loving you, this song is for you.  




                                                         Won't Let Go Lyrics by Rascal Flatts



It's like a storm that cuts a pathIt's breaks your will, it feels like thatYou think you're lost, but you're not lostOn your own, you're not aloneI will stand by youI will help you throughWhen you've done all you can doAnd you can't copeI will dry your eyesI will fight your fightI will hold you tightAnd I won't let goIt hurts my heart to see you cryI know it's dark, this part of lifeOh, it finds us allAnd we're too small to stop the rainOh, but when it rainsI will stand by youI will help you throughWhen you've done all you can doAnd you can't copeI will dry your eyesI will fight your fightI will hold you tightAnd I won't let you fallDon't be afraid to fallI'm right here to catch youI won't let you downIt won't get you downYou're gonna make itYeah, I know you can make it'Cause I will stand by youI will help you throughWhen you've done all you can doAnd you can't copeAnd I will dry your eyesI will fight your fightI will hold you tightAnd I won't let goOh, I'm gonna hold youAnd I won't let goWon't let you goNo, I won't

Family Hardships and Challenges

What does the word family mean to you? Do you think family if people who are blood related? NO, by now you are probably like what is this crazy chick talking about right? Right, well I am going to tell you what I am talking about.  To me the word family if earned.  A spot in my "family" is not auto matically given, it's earned.  It's earned by sticking with me throught the thick and the thin, throught the good and the bad times not just the good.  Giving up on one another is a big no no in my family book, if you honestly care about your "family" you won't give up on your family.  I will admit I have done alot of bad things in my life, but that does not mean give up on me it just means that i need you more at that point of the situation then any of the other points.  My father gave up on me when  I was only nine years old, it killed me. I was only nine, and I was just beginning the start of my destruction in life, and he was only making it happen faster, and causing it to happen more often.  I'm not trying to Dis, I'm just stating that giving up on the ones you say you love is not the answer, help then get through the hard times and it will definitely be easy to get through the good times.  There are going to be situations where the "bad times" are not as hard as most, but the majority of the "bad times" are going to be a rough ride.  So here is my challenge, if you have given up on a loved one, ask them for forgiveness, they are not going to forgive you right away and it's going to take time, so be patient with them, forgiveness is a process, but be there for them during that time, make them believe that you want to be back in their life, but it's not only them it's you to, you have to want to be a part of their life again.  So my challenge to those who walked out and want to come back in, is to ask for forgiveness, and be a part in their life, help them through good and bad times, and I guarantee you will feel better knowing that you tried to be back in their lives.  I am not going to promise they will let you back in, but just try, even if they say no, don't give up, be there for them, because to them they are without actually telling you testing you to see if you honestly want back in their lives, so take my challenge and see how things go from there. 

My life

 

Hi my name is Martaysha, but everyone just calls me Martie.  I am 16 years old and a junior in high school.  At 9 years old i was taken out of my home and placed into foster care, 5 years later i was adopted by two wonderful people.   When i first moved in with my parents i was bitter and angry, who wouldn't be? I had just lost people that i loved, i lost my mother who lived in a completely different state at, my father who I was living with at the time, and most important to me my two younger sisters who were both living with my mom in Indiana.  I was in 2 different foster homes and 4 different level 6 group homes.  Level six group homes are for kids who have severe behavior issues, and I was one of those with that problem.  People now wouldn't believe that I was a troubled child but thats because I have a mom and a dad who pay attention to me.  Most kids who go through or are going through what i have been through act tough because they want attention, attention that they never have gotten from their own families.  I remember i used to get so mad at kids who said they hated their parents and siblings, sometimes I just wanted to smack them and say "well at least you have a family to go home to, a family who loves and cares for you and will always love and care for you, a family who will go to their graves loving and caring for you."  I now have two of the most amazing parents that I could ever ask for, I know sometimes I get mad at what they tell me to do or something like that, but what normal teenager doesn't do that?  That comes to a few more amazing things that have happend to me. 

     Earlier this year I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.  He used a guy that goes to my church to open my eyes and realise that I need him in my life.  This particulare man had cancer, I hadn't been around anyone with cancer since my grandma passed away 8 years ago from lung cancer, and it "broke" my heart to see someone suffering like that.  I don't know what kind of cancer he had but I think it was pretty bad, so after the sermon that day I went up to my mom and said "I think it's time to let Jesus in, he has been knocking on my door for to long and I need to let him in now." She just smiled at me and said "welcome to the family."  I then with my mom and my pastors wife went into another room and prayed and let God take over my life.  I am still hanging onto a little bit of bitterness from my birth father, but I think that is now gone to.  The other day i sent a letter to my father and told him how i felt, I told him I want a relationship with him and only him.  I gave him numbers that he could reach me at so I'm just waiting for him to make a decision now. 

      My last thing i would like to talk about before I end this is my wonderful boyfriend.  I know alot of people day that it's impossible to fall in love at 16, but I think that they are wrong.  Not everyone is going to fall in love at 16, 17, or 18, but there are acceptions to the rule, and I think my boyfriend and I are one of those acceptions.  I am going to say this, I am in LOVE with my boyfriend.  He is an amazing guy.  He is always there for me and is constantly picking me up when I fall.  He is always there when I need him, and when i don't need him. :)  Even though I scare him when I get mad he always attempts to try and calm me down, most of the time it works if it's not him I'm mad at.  He pretty much completes me, if that makes any since at all. 

      That is all i have to say this time around, thanks for taking the time to read this and I hope you read more posts that i put on here.